Friday, February 5, 2010

Double Digits

My eldest is ten. It is hard to believe he has grown from this to a decade old young man. He taught me how to love. I mean really love someone without wanting anything from them. The kind of love that has no conditions. The kind of love where you would die for that person...really. Loving Parker made every other love in my life deeper and more meaningful. Parker has made my life so much better just by being himself. He is an old soul and I don't think for a moment that I can take credit for the person he is. He came into this world with a personality that melts my heart and makes me want to be a better person. No one is perfect and he definitely has his days when I realize, yes, he is a child...a goofy kid, at times. He spends hours in his own imagination, he likes to have things neat and orderly, he thinks of others almost to a fault, he takes care of everyone and is a wonderful big brother, he is smart and funny, he takes forever to tell a story, he feels equally content alone and in crowds, he finds it hard to take a compliment, he stays up way too late, he has more patience than anyone I know, he adores being outside in freezing cold and sweltering heat, he is terrified of tornadoes, he gets queasy when he sees blood, he loves to create, he is a little too cautious, he loves other children from babies to late teens, it pains him to see others suffer, he feels everything deeply, he is sensitive and trusting...he filled my heart so much I didn't think I could love another child, but he showed me that hearts grow to fit our needs.
When he was born, I knew I wanted to hold him, to get to know him, even if he only lived ten minutes. Now ten years have gone by in an instant. I wish I could relive every second and take it all in more deeply. Cherish it all even more. How unParker of me to wish this. He lives in the moment. He holds his memories dear, but lets go of the past and future. I learn something new every day with him and I hope we have several decades more together. I love you, sweetheart. Happy Birthday!


Susan said...

Beautiful, Linda. Just beautiful.

Emily and Kit said... made me cry -- a happy, beautiful cry! Thank you for sharing. Parker is indeed an amazing soul. We feel so lucky to know him along with you, Rob, Dema and Josie!