An Ode to IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper

Ode to IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
When I bake with puff pastry or am craving cookies, you are the one I reach for.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
You keep me from using unnecessary oil and you make clean up a snap.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
If I could change one thing about you, yes my love is not unconditional...
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
Anyway, that one thing would be your size, yeah, I know, I'm so shallow, but it is true.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
It seems like a cruel joke that you a tad too wide.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
In my perfect universe, you would be exactly the size of my baking pans so I wouldn't have to fold you. I'm lazing and feel like it is a waste.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
I rarely think of you, but when I need you and you are gone, I am lost.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
Kind of like the springy toilet paper dispenser thingy which one of the kids broke, I don't realize how much I miss you, until I want to use you.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
I should make a special trip to the store to buy you, sorry if I'm making you feel used and cheap.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
But the truth is our relationship is all one-way. I take and you give.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
Are you really better for the environment or am I fooling myself?
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
I still like how I can use you twice before recycling you.
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
I messed up and used waxed paper once and I promise to never cheat again!
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
Smoke, carcinogens, icky mess, what was I thinking?
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper
I know I don't always show it, but I adore you!
IF YOU CARE® Parchment Paper