Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Home, Sweat, Home?

Nope, not a typo. Our house is pretty hot and humid after being shut up for a week and a half while we were living it up on the beach. It is good to be home thought, right? Well, yes and no. I hate going away with a messy house because when you come home...it is still a mess. That is a major drag and after spending two days on the road coming home, it is not something which puts me in a good mood. Both Rob and I had things we put off or should have dealt with before our vacation or during and we were a little crabby about it all when reality sunk in as we stepped in the door. It didn't help that our yard has become even more of an unruly jungle in our absence (don't know what we thought would happen...it doesn't mow itself).

On top of all of this, my sweet little four year old son greeted one of his favorite adult neighbor friends with "My friends don't like you." I could have died on the spot. I just didn't know what to say and tried to smooth it over, as did Rob, and we both made it worse. I couldn't figure out where this came from and Dema clearly did not realize what he had done wrong. I quickly asked him to help me unload the car. He had overheard Parker telling me a story on the trip to NC and one of the many, many details (those of you who know Parker, know that my eight year old can talk and talk and talk and doesn't spare a detail) was a guess that the reason why his neighborhood gang doesn't talk to this particular adult neighbor is because they don't like her and he doesn't understand why. Well, this was just a guess on his part and we continued the discussion to say that most of the other kids don't know her and a lot of kids (unlike my children...for better or worse) don't feel comfortable around adults they don't know and they probably don't dislike her at all. I didn't even realize Dema was listening and he takes in a bit of what is said (he was very upset a couple days ago when someone said they "turned their mother into a monster"...hours later he was asking me how they turned her into a monster and if she would be turned back...he was very, very concerned...he is a very literal little guy) and there you go...a very hurt friend. I took Dema aside and explained that our friend's feelings were probably very hurt by what he said and that he didn't even know if this was true. Dema was shocked and didn't know why it hurt her and he started crying and then Parker started crying. I was upset with them both and Dema took matters into his own hands and marched down to her house and tried to make things right. I don't know if it worked. I feel terrible.

I wish I could just have a "do over" on this evening.

5 comments:

fredbunch said...

Hey - glad you guys made it home safely. Sounds like it wasn't the best night for you, which means tomorrow will hopefully get better. I'm going to try to call you in the next few days to discuss cloth diapers. I spoke with the daycare and it looks like I'll only be using cloth diapers on nights and weekends during the coming school year. If there is anything in your "gently used" category of Tribal Life that I can use, that would be great. I'll talk to you in more detail soon.

Tell everyone hello!

VeganLinda said...

Fredbunch,

Thanks and I hope the Florida trip is going well for your gang. I do have some gently used ones (too bad about daycare). Email me with your new address...I meant to get it while we were in NC.

Cynthia said...

oh I hate coming home to a messy house....but I always do no matter how I swear I'll have it clean when we leave....

I sometimes die at what comes out of Owen's mouth too....last night he told me I had fat knees and was completely confused when his father glared at him....

McBloggy said...

Aw, that is so hard to take. Luckily we all understand that kids sometimes lack the more subtle social graces. Consider yourself lucky to have children that are sensitive enough to feel badly and try to right their wrongs. It's something to be proud of even when it doesn't feel that way.

Vivacious Vegan said...

I know this wasn't meant to be funny but I couldn't help but laugh. It gets filed under the "kids say the darndest things" category. One of these days you'll probably laugh about it too. I also thought it was pretty funny how Dema thought the friend's mom really got turned into a monster. Not having kids myself, all of these moments make me giggle.

Your children are both very sweet and sensitive and will probably grow into wonderful adults. You're doing something right!